Cruise movies

I just happen to see the trailer for the movie "Reno 911" while getting ready for work this afternoon. Yes, dear readers your poor scribe has been moved to the midnight check. This is the first time that I saw it and probably won't be the last until the movie actually breaks. What is really bad that at work today I mentioned it and nearly all of us came to the conclusion that it was probably going to be on the top 5 movies to be shown constantly while we are going to be on cruise. This is a phenom unknown Hollywood, but know to nearly everyone in the military. That is the cruise/deployment movie. The basic rule as most of my friends and co-workers seem to notice is this about a cruise movie: It has to be stupid, have no or minimal plot, some form of gratuitous boob shot, and typically have some sort of screwball plan to wrap it all up in the end.

The cruise video always seems to rear its ugly head the further out and away from civilization we get. It seems that the longer we spend out to see with out seeing land really bad movies or really cheesy movies always seem to pop-up more and more on the Ship's internal TV channel services. I don't know if someone just hates the crew and wants to suppress moral even more or in some sort of Jerry Lewis misguided attempt to raise moral put something completely dumb on hoping that we won't realize that we are surround by miles of water, 4999 other people, and gray.

Just thinking about this had me go through nearly all of my cruise movie moments and think of them that were shown while I have been underway for everything such as a short time 1 month exercise det, to the long haul 6 monther. This list is in no way complete or comprehensive, but should give you a good overview of the Moral Suppression Team in action.

Cruise movies:

• 
  Dodgeball
  Smokey and the Bandit
  Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
• Red Dawn
  Nearly any Adam Sandler Comedy
• Iron Eagle
• Armageddon
• Titantic- Although this one doesn't abide by most of the rules laid out above. The biggest reason that this is here is because most us on a cruise don't want to be reminded of drowning and women.
• Mortal Kombat
• Crocodile Dundee series

There are others I know, but I have successfully pushed them deep into the recess of my mind hoping never again being forced to glimpse them or try and remember their titles.

I will say this there are also a series of films that are nearly constantly shown while underway as well that although meet the requirements above some how rise above the pack and are half-way decent that others will fight to turn the TV over to that movie. Such as: Blazing Saddles, Ghostbusters, Beverly Hills Cop, Delta Force, Revenge of the Nerds.
These are movies that help past the time and forget about how bad the food was, or that the doc had prescribed Vitamin M and Water for my broke leg, and the Dear John letter (or email) I got that day.

Well I hope that this next cruise I will do that I am not forced to watch a few of the movies on my list. I know the truth though and can't wait to find something else to do on my down time.